Song writing help needed...

This song is to the tune of Escape aka Pena Colada
http://www.deadbabes.net/artist_r/rupert_holmes_all_songs/escape_the_pina_colada_song_lyrics.html

So the revised version chorus starts:

If you like penis alotta
and getting fucked by a train

ADD MORE

Porn, it's better than dating!

Dear Dr. Nutcrackher,

I recently came across a bump-her sticker that said, "Porn, it's better than dating!"

I am a little confused by this message and I was wondering if you could shed some light on this.

CowPoker

Hey CowPoker,
Good question; thanks for asking! I came up with a list of reasons, since there ain't just one.

Top 10 Reasons Porn is better than Dating

10. Porn is cheaper than dating
9. Porn won't intentionally play mind-fuck games with you
8. Porn doesn't worry about what to eat at dinner
7. Porn doesn't get jealous if you look at others or even jack off to them
6. Porn has never cut off a viewer's dick (ask Lorena Carrot about this one)
5. Variety, variety, variety
4. How many dates will let you spend a minute with one girl, another minute with another girl, three minutes with 3 girls, all of different ethnicities, and then let you splooge all over her
3. You always get lucky with porn (even if your palms grow more hairy)
2. You don't have to listen to the audio with porn
1. It's a lot easier to get midget porn than midget dates